#NBA #Straya – Never Forget: HAMMER DAY! Shane 🔨 Heal’s career night vs the Seattle Supersonics, Nov 27, 1996
That’s right: every November 27 all around this wide brown land we loving call ‘Straya, there’s not a dry eye OR an unbent elbow as an entire proud nation celebrates & tips back a few tins in honour of HAMMER DAY.
Yep, HAMMER DAY. A non-stop celebration of dead-set Aussie ledge, the Blonde-Bombshell, the Sydney Smasher, the Geelong Goolie-Gnasher, the Brisbane Ball-Slinger, the Yarra Junction Yahoo, the Charles Barkley Chin-Musician himself… Shane ‘The Hammer’ Heal!
It’s all because on this day, 24 years ago, Shane pulled on his tighty-whiteys — no-doubt tight & straining to cover a hog that’s still talked about in hushed tones around Geelong, Brisbane & Sydney — and went to work on my beloved Seattle Supersonics like me going to work on an icy-cold sixer of Doss X tinnies for Friday froths!
In only his 9th ever NBA game, Hammer came off the bench for his Minnesota Timberwolves on a cold November night, and proved why when people ask: ‘what would happen if you combined Ray Allen, Reggie Miller, Pistol Pete Maravich, Steph Curry and a vat of peroxide’ the answer is AND ALWAYS WILL BE… ’Bloody Shane Heal, ya dickhead’.
Cos in the 4th quarter alone… Hammer chucked in a whopping FIFTEEN POINTS… ALL ON THREES! Against bloody Gary ‘The Glove’ Payton & Hersey Hawkins!
He was more on fire than that time at a party outside of Ballarat my mate Matt chucked some petrol on a bonfire and it went back up jerry can and bloody exploded and set Matt on fire!
AND! Legend has it that as his FIFTH three sailed in over the top of the head of an increasingly confused Hersey Hawkins, 15 women in attendance instantly fell pregnant. They’re still known in Minnesota as ‘The Hammer 15’ and all have gone on to be in the NBA. That’s not to be confused with Kemp’s 17… most of whom are still waiting for a call from their dad.
And, in proof that the Anti-Strayan Bias of the NBA has a long and storied history, those flogs in charge of Minnesota at the time looked at Hammer, looked at his 15 pts on 5-of-9 shooting ALL FROM THREE… IN ONLY BLOODY 12 MINS… then decided to pin the poor bugger right back to the bench the very next game, and he’d never reach such lofty NBA heights again! How f*cked is that!?
Anyway, now when people ask ‘wow, how much did Steph Curry change the game!?’ you can set em straight & say ‘mate, bugger that little pre-pubescent dork: he was just following in the footsteps of the one, the only, Shane ‘The Hammer’ Heal.
And that, mate, is why while the US might celebrate Thanksgiving, we celebrate the bloke who tried to punch on with Charles Barkley, despite being a foot shorter than him, with… HAMMER DAY.
#ONYA Hammer! 🇦🇺🏀💪 🔨
SMASH the TWO-PART EPISODES featuring our chat with Hammer RIGHT HERE :
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