In honour of his decision to forego the rest of this NBA season to look after his missus and family back in ‘Straya, NBA Straya today hoists ‘em up to the Croatian-Australian Wilt Chamberlain — Andrew Bogut — who, on this day 7 years ago, had an absolute blinder for the Milwaukee Bucks against the ol’ Charlotte Bobcats.
Still recovering from when that prick Amar’e Stoudemire undercut him and mangled his right arm and elbow worse than Angry Anderson’s Batmobile-assisted attempt at ‘Bound For Glory’ down at Waverley Park in ’91, Big Bogey towelled the big buttery French croissant Boris Diaw and the rest of the Hornets for 26 points on a blistering 13-of-19 from the field. Not bloody bad for a bloke whose right arm only eight months ago looked like a chicken twistie.
But how’s this. On every single one of his nineteen field goal attempts, apparently the mongrel refs decided big Bogey wasn’t fouled… not even once. NO FREE THROWS! ON NINETEEN SHOTS! For a bloke that likes getting in the guts of it more than every little fella named Darren down your local footy club!? That’s so much anti-Strayan bias it’s more of an outrage than finding out Cam Bancroft’s got a sponsorship deal with Scotch Tape!
Anyway. Endeavour Hills’ favourite son also muscled his way in the paint like mighty Svetovid himself for 9 huge rebounds that were so textbook perfect there’s a standing order from the Education Department that they should be taught in schools from Broome to Bermagui.
The Mighty Croat also had a steal so all-encompassing that he also stole Stephen Jackson’s social security number, stole his identity and took out a car loan in his name, and delivered 2 huge blocks that so demoralised poor Eduardo Najera that he retired on the spot.
Bogut didn’t bother to register an assist… but perhaps for not for lack of trying, as Brandon ‘Shoot it From China’ Jennings went 10 of 26, while John ‘West Knows Best’ Salmons and Carlos ‘AirGentina’ Delfino combined for 4-of-18 themselves. That’s a worse than when Jay Dee Springbett was one of the hosts of ‘Australian Idol’.
Anyway! 26 points, 9 rebounds, 2 blocks and a steal that confuses Stephen Jackson to this very day! Even though they lost by a point, that’s not a bad outing for the Crafty Croat!
And now he’s back in Oz looking after the fam, and we wish the big fella, his missus and family all the best.
#ONYA Big Bogey!
