Just imagine it: eight years ago TODAY, Jason Derulo’s ‘In My Head’ was spending its second week atop the #ARIA charts, and The Great Aussie Dane, David Andersen — aka Stretched-out Delly — had the SECOND HIGHEST SCORING GAME OF HIS ENTIRE #NBA CAREER!
That’s right, despite looking like the bass player in a Melbourne Uni experimental ska-funk band, The Great Aussie Dane put the Houston Rockets on his back and carried them to a blow-out win over the Toronto Raptors (the team he’d be traded to in the coming off-season), dominating Andrea ‘Andrea’ Bargnani and Rasho ‘Is That Contagious’ Nesterovic like he was Clarkey against the Indians at the SCG in 2012!
Coming off the bench, in his 22 glorious minutes Aussie Chris Bosh scored with an ease and agility that stunned onlookers, sinking shots from all corners in a display of Original Unicorn-ism that ought to be taught in schools from Broome to Bermagui. He finished with 16 points, going 6-of-9 (NICE) from the field, 2/2 from the line, and — showing that he had more range than a long-haul Nullarbor roadtrain truckie named Dale — hit 2 of his 3 three-pointers.
BUT! Not content with his second biggest NBA scoring outing ever – #facts – The Great Aussie Dane attacked the boards with a mix of bloodlust and ferocity befitting the long line of Danish Viking kings he’s undoubtedly descended from, and snagged five boards.
Meanwhile, showcasing the grit and heart of his Strayan heritage, Stretched-Out Delly also calmly added 2 assists that were more delicious than a cold pint of #Furphys after a day of hard yakka, stole a ball that Hedo Turkoglu is still wandering around the Toyota Center searching for, and had a single vicious block that literally ended poor Patrick O’Bryant’s career and caused eight nearby women to fall pregnant.
Stretched-Out Delly finished with 16/5/2/1/1 and a +19 for the game, and it would go down as the second best NBA game of his NBA career.
Not bad for a bloke who had the facial hair of someone not allowed near primary schools.
And now Big Ando — along with his original Unicorn game and 11 rings from around the globe — is leading Melbourne United Basketball Club up against the SKYCITY Breakers NZ this weekend in the NBL semis, and undoubtedly on his way an even dozen rings!
#ONYA Stretched-Out Delly!
