On this day, three shorts years ago, big Andrew Bogut — the Croatian-Strayan Wilt Chamberlain — was leading the Golden State Warriors to the NBA title and playing basketball, rather than what he does now: running Melbourne’s municipal council policy agenda via twitter. And WHAT a game the Hulking Human Headline played against the New Orleans Pelicans, setting a HUGE CAREER HIGH in his 10th NBA season!
That’s right, the Pride of Endeavour Hills went Russell Crowe-hotel-phone-level HAM against basketball-playing pterodactyl Anthony Davis and the Pels, throwing more dirty elbows than Joel Selwood, playing tighter man-to-man defense than bloody Brian Lake and laying more wood than an Upper Beaconsfield arborist… on his way to a CAREER HIGH NINE BLOCKS!
NINE BLOCKS! Bloody hell, you’d think big Bogey was lining up against the Narre Warren mixed-U8’s netball team!
The best bit? The Titanic Tweeter’s two blocks on Toney Douglas were swatted so comprehensively they also booked lil’ Tone first-class plane tickets and set him up in a fully-furnished apartment in Istanbul in preparation for his new home in the Turkish league.
And while the Cranky Croat wasn’t busy proving to everyone why he’s the best defensive big man since Dikembe Mutombo was wagging his finger at fools, Big Bogey added 8 points on 4-of-8 shooting through a combination of post moves more silky-smooth than Gary Ablett Jnr’s bonce and dunks more thunderous than a night watching the V8s at Calder Park.
The Towering Terror of Bogut also tore down 8 rebounds with so much focused rage that Omer Asik started crying and got made fun of by the refs, added a steal so deft he also nicked Quincy Pondexter’s ‘Q’ so the poor bugger now has to call himself ‘Uincy Pondexter’ and also handed off threes assists so beautiful that Leandro Barbosa was later seen taking them all out to dinner.
Still, the mongrel refs robbed Big Bogey of a 10-for by calling him for FIVE absolute rubbish fouls — you just know there were about 3 blocks there that were called fouls because of anti-Strayan bias — leaving me thinking that the refs should’ve bent over and used their only good eye.
How’s that though!? 8 points, 3 assists, 8 rebounds, 1 steal and NINE blocks. NINE! That’s better than a night out on the turps with Baby John Burgess!
#ONYA Big Bogey!
